Monthly Archives: December 2012

***

As ever, the word is here. These words. Consistent companion, unflinching even to the touch of my firing fingertips.

I have hurt people, in ways that I have been hurt, after vowing to not ever create that kind of expression in the face of another upon hearing my words, resultant from the verbal daggers I throw to cut to the truth. It will never feel right, cutting that way, and yet there is a compulsive (com?)passion which overtakes me, a mission to unleash demons, that they may devour the fear bred by polite correctness, by pretense. I am in this world, but not of it, and there is no more clarity of such than when in conversation with some earthling I love, when life itself is at stake. “Life” being aliveness, awareness, awakeness. My fierceness stems from the unlikeliest of places, this (in)human heart [*in a human], the one that pumps blood through me, and invariably onto any who would stand before me and pretend not to know that the forming of the Universe occurred via the very same explosive nature of creation, complete with bang and scattering of shrapnel known more commonly as stars. We — or, more and more, I — understand that Love is all ways the basis, the intent. Therefore to hear it from any other Source is at once confusing and disturbing.

There is a chance that the cosmos understands, as it is the collective child of such chaotic, Loving explosion. And this is why I will always hug the sky, and feel like I am going home when I keep my head up*

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what i done learned.

it’s been a loooong time for one of these, but vintage throwbacks serve a purpose.

so here it is, what i iz learning’d:

that i am not always right, and that sometimes, i soooooo am. that breathing is usually a good answer to any question. that my soulmates are anyone i’m talking with. that sometimes i pop into a new reality, and only some people look familiar, but all of us are here to be fulfilled… to enjoy. and those no longer here are simply showing up in different configurations (read: values). that snow and open, wide plains are the reboot. that when i look at the sky, i feel less alone than ever. and sometimes the sky looks like the eyes of a child, or an adult with child* that laughing loud and laughing often is the old school way: how else can we surpass our greatest “defeats” with an eye toward what must become more? that pinwheel cookies are snacks, and meals, too. that Godliness is alive and well. that the wee hours are here, waiting, for someone to listen. and that, yes, completely, we are here to THRIVE <3

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